Recently, I discovered a treasure trove of great content for the blog in a journal I filled when Anna was 7-8 and Laura was on the way, and Susie was still a baby. I wrote up six interesting pages where I was trying to express who I am and what motivates me. This kind of journaling can be very therapeutic for us as moms. I thought it might bless others to be able to share in my thoughts from these early years…
We begin with a poem…because writing poetry is therapeutic for me.
Call me to the quiet place
Though all the world rages
Call me into your tender embrace
Draw me deep into your pages.
Let me “let go” of all the treasure
The trials, triumphs, pain…
Let me forsake my glory
Let me not see my own fame.
Let me disappear into your radiant light
Let me know the stillness of your sight
Let me be free from all the earthly care
Let me take a breath of heaven’s air.
I come with no beauty of my own
I come empty and I come alone
With trembling hands and trembling heart I bow
To the glory of your presence, I come now.
Undeserving, wicked, weak and poor
Broken, humbled, knocking at your door,
Lost in your eternal touch of grace
I have found such love in my Father’s face.
Open wide your gate and draw me in
Make me pure, purge me from my sin
Let me see the cross of Christ again
Let your holy work on me bring victory to win.
Triumph over sin and shame and grief
Blow away all vanity in me
Purge the dark and destitute places in my soul
Bring me through the fire until you see gold.
Mighty works-these my hands can’t bring
Holiness-Is it just a song I sing?
Beauty-Is it only surface deep?
Oh, let your holy will be born in me.
A living sacrifice I now become
Though I am not righteous, holy one
See me through the shed blood of your song
Through life and death, my victory is won.
Holiness and purity are mine
With your radiant beauty I now shine
I am light in the shadow of the cross
I find life in the shadow of the cross.
(December 18, 2007)