Fun-Schooling Family Stories: Britt Stilwell

Today we welcome Fun-Schooling mam Brittany Stilwell for a guest post!!

Hi, I’m Britt! I am a homeschooling mother to 7 children ages 12, 11, 9, 7, 5, 2, and 3 months. Together we live in sunny South Florida, right on the coast. We are very familiar with neurodiversities as 3 of my children are autistic, as well as myself. We also have one child gifted with dyslexia.

Finding curricula for my children was quite the challenge considering their different needs and abilities. I never wanted them to feel frustrated or like they were “less than” for not being able to properly fill out worksheets with information they may never remember. Instead, I desired something more for them. I wanted to provide them with an education that would help them learn more about themselves while focusing on their gifts and talents. When we found The Thinking Tree, I was intrigued. Could my children really excel using these beautiful books? We tried several of the Minecraft journals as a family–a favorite theme of ours. Our homeschool was forever changed. We haven’t looked back yet!

I wanted to share a little of what I’ve learned over the years that we have been using Fun-Schooling journals and what things look like for us now that we have found our groove. 💕

  1. Keep it simple! Don’t overcomplicate things. Don’t overthink things. Go in with a clear head and an open mind. Be ready to say yes more often than no. ✔️
  2. It’s okay to buy all the journals. 💸 (Yes! I just said that! lol) It’s okay if your child wants to use all of the journals at once. It’s okay if your child wants to use just one at a time. As long as they are learning and getting work done, roll with it. 🤓
  3. Let your kids pick out their journal(s)! 📚 This is so important to my kids. They really feel in charge of their education when they have the freedom to study exactly what they want and how they want. 🌎 🦋 🔬
  4. It’s okay if all of your child’s books are relevant to their journals, or none are relevant at all. Maybe they liked the pretty horse cover but they want to study George Washington. 🤷🏽‍♀️ It’s their journal after all. Let them really own it and create something that reflects themselves. 🪞
  5. Let them loose! Maybe they only do a few really good pages a day or maybe they get excited for the next page and hurry through. ✏️ Don’t discourage their learning by telling them how you’d rather it be done. I have done this plenty and it has always hurt their spirit. 😞
  6. Believe they are capable, because they really are! 🥰
  7. There is no wrong way to use Fun-Schooling journals, but there is a right way. The right way is to always be sure there is FUN in each day! 🎲

And lastly…

8. Lead. By. Example. 👯‍♀️

I can’t stress this one enough. Emulate the behaviors and habits you wish to see in your children. Yes, personalities are different. I have 7 children and no two are alike, but they are all watching ME. The best things we can teach our kids will not come from library books or curricula, but from within our own hearts and what we do with our hands. 💗

With all that said, below are 5 of the journal and book choices of my kiddos. I love the variety!

Want your story to be featured on the blog? Reply in the comments with your ideas!

Inside the Heart of Sensory Processing Issues

Consider this a letter from a loved one who is having a meltdown because of a panic attack, an autism spectrum disorder, or sensory processing overload…

My friend,

Please be patient, I’m trying to sort things out. I need to feel some comfort and acceptance from you right now. I’m really sorry for the way I responded, but I’m just trying to cope with something that is making me feel anxious and afraid for reasons that I can’t explain. So be my friend and remember who I am.

If you ask me questions, or try to get me to make decisions, or if you treat me like I’m a child who is misbehaving, beware I might slip into a deep well of sadness, feeling all alone. If you tell me that I should get over it, or tell me that I’m being irrational, I would certainly agree with you, if I could think clearly, but I can’t. Those kinds of comments will actually work against us, since I already know that I am wrong and I don’t desire to be in this place of fear and confusion. I’m embarrassed, but I can’t pull myself out. I can’t just choose to flip a switch that makes me feel like all is well.

You have the power to show love, comfort, kindness and compassion, to bring me back to a place where I feel safe and protected. You may feel like pushing me away or avoiding me right now. If you choose to treat me like I am a problem, I will feel like I am alone, abandoned, and in danger.

Choose loving words, a gentle and firm touch, be kind, encourage, and remind me who I am and why I am loved, why I am wanted, why I am safe, why I am treasured and worth it.

Right now I am most likely struggling with feelings of misplaced fear, and humiliation because I can’t be who you want me to be. I love you so much that it breaks my heart to know that when I face the pain of this sensory overload, I can’t be myself.

When I am melting down and wrought with confusion because of this social situation… I can’t be cheerful and funny and sweet. Maybe you think that if I really love you I can choose to snap out of this mode, but I can’t figure out how to be lovable right now. Even though I resemble a hedgehog, but less cute, I need love and acceptance more than anything in the world.

So maybe you will try to show me a little love, but I won’t respond like you expect. I know that this is really hard for you, but don’t give up. I need you now. Don’t give the silent treatment, don’t try to force me to choose a restaurant, don’t try to get me to apologize for my bad behavior.

Just protect me, cause right now I am very weak. Be strong. Be like Jesus who loved us and gave himself for us, when we were yet sinners. To love is to deny self, and I’ll thank you later. Right now just remember who I am and keep me safe.

New Neurodivergent/Autism Journal

I embrace my Asperger’s as a gift. I feel like it isn’t something I should be ashamed of–we are just wired differently, yet have so many unique gifts and talents. I was about 30 when I realized what made me different, at the time my nephew and several family members were diagnosed with Asperger’s and my daughter Anna, with Dyslexia. It was refreshing to begin to understand my quirks, gifts and reason for my struggles. All through school I mystified the teachers, they couldn’t understand how an intelligent girl with a high IQ could fail so terribly in school–and why was I such a target for the bullies?

I was very uncomfortable with conversation, and did not enjoy playing with kids my age. I liked babies, enjoyed talking to some adults, and had a strong connection with animals. I always avoided looking at people, and loved gadgets and spinning things. I was constantly counting everything and was obsessed with patterns, space travel, genealogy and genetics. I was one of those kids who could solve Rubik’s Cubes and logic puzzles in a flash, but was terrified of my classmates. I would rather eat sand than talk to the kids in the lunch room. I wore my hair over my eyes to keep out the fluorescent lights, and to keep people from seeing me. I was always designing things and drawing things and building habitats for small animals. I created a museum in my own backyard. I was a weird kid, and I knew it. I didn’t care what anyone thought of me.

Until I was 14 years old I refused to make eye contact and my symptoms of Autism were much more severe than they are now. Something changed. People with Asperger’s tend to have very intense special interests. My interest was drawing people’s eyes and doing makeup. I became fascinated by the human face. Once I began to get comfortable looking at faces I quickly began to overcome many symptoms related to socializing.

I started with magazine tutorials teaching step by step how to apply make up. Looking at models on a page wasn’t as uncomfortable as looking at people in real life. I even took acting, photography, and modeling classes. I worked specifically on becoming comfortable with eye contact and began doing makeup on myself and others.

Once I was comfortable with looking at faces, I began to get curious about the color of everyone’s eyes. So I would look at people. I also began to draw pictures of people in magazines and would focus on eyes and expressions.

I didn’t know that I was overcoming a lot of social anxiety in the process.

Once I was willing to look at people’s faces, and even study people’s faces, I started to understand the connection between their words, tone of voice, feelings and facial expression. I didn’t have feelings of empathy until I started reading faces.

Getting over the discomfort of looking at a person’s face was incredibly hard. When I would make eye contact as a young child I felt like I could see down into the soul. It was too much.

The goal of this book is to gently help the student to study faces, color the eyes, trace the faces and expressions, and identify the emotions of the person or animal in each picture. As the student engages in these activities they subconsciously begin to work through the feelings of resistance and anxiety that often accompany eye contact. Once the student becomes more familiar with faces they may begin to experience stronger empathy and feel more comfortable while engaging with others.

I can’t promise or claim that this book will help your loved one, but it’s worth a try. I’m releasing it for less than $10 so you can easily become part of this research experiment if you would like to. I know that my Dyslexia Therapy has been incredibly successful, and our Dyscalculia Games have made an amazing difference in the lives of struggling learners. So far I’ve seen positive results using these activities with children who are on the spectrum. So if you are willing, give it a try!

I know that there will be people who are skeptical and will want to tell me why this is not the professional way to help people with Autism. If you are that person, please wait at least one month before judging the program. Thanks!

For those who prefer not to have the word “Autism” on the cover, this option is now available.

How Your Child Thinks: The Inventors (Part 3)

visual thinkers inventors creators

The visual thinkers of the world were created to be the designers, inventors, the artists, the musicians, the sailors and explorers. We say they have a problem with obedience and respect or we call it Dyslexia, Asperger’s Syndrome or ADHD. We try to tame them. Honestly, we have failed them . If a child is failing in his classroom, it is the classroom that failed the child. The child is not the one with a problem just because he learns differently.

The child must be set free to be the inventor, the artist, the dancer. So who will teach the inventor? Who will train the artist? The child must become his own teacher, and his parents and teachers must become his students, to learn from him, to understand him, to realize that he has within him the power to become great. We need to discover how to help him become who he was meant to be. We must accept that it may never happen in a desk, in a classroom and behind a pile of textbooks, even if you give the child medication and take away his crayons. Do you want to be the one to take away Albert’s compass, Benjamin’s kite, or Leonardo’s paintbrush or little Thomas Edison’s mirrors?

What is the solution for the child who fails in the classroom? Set him free from the classroom. Ask the child what he wants to learn about. Ask the child what he wants to do. Take the child to the book store, take the child to the art store, take the child to the beach, the forest, the ruins of a castle. Give him pets and let him catch lizards. Read to him until he learns to read to himself. Search for learning materials that captivate the visual mind–things like compasses, clay, mirrors, and paintbrushes. Let him sail, play instruments, and dig in the dirt. Let him take things apart and give him colored pencils. Let him watch people at work doing all different things in the world, take him to the kitchen, take him to an art studio, take him into factories and show him how to use sewing machines, instruments, scroll-saws, and tools. Let her dance. (to continue reading click here)

Work or Play? Why not BOTH?

Whenever my kids are playing hard and having the BIGGEST fun doing whatever kids do, when no one is telling them what to do I always ask them, “What are you working on?”  I use the word “WORKING”.  I call their activity a PROJECT.   They never say “Nothing, I’m just playing.”  No, they go into a detailed description of something amazing, that starts with: “I’m trying to build a… I’m figuring out how to… I am making a…  I’m taking this thing apart… I’m putting together a new!”

When they are playing they are often doing work that is very meaningful and important in their eyes.  I have a daughter who was always very, very busy, I was always trying to pull her away from her “play” as if it were a waste of time, because I didn’t yet see the value of play. After all, she was 9 and should be doing things that look like school. She knew how to read and write, and she was always in her own world.

One day it was raining outside and she was looking out the window.  She had been there for a long time. She was supposed to be in the school room with her science book.  I was about to tell her to stop sitting around and get back to work.  Then I noticed she had a notebook with all these strange little marks, pictures, checks and numbers.  So I asked, “What are you doing?”

“Oh, I was just charting the storm, timing the lighting and the thunder and measuring sound and distance.  I’ve been charting the weather for about a month.”

I started unschooling that child on that day, and at that point I began to ask my kids what they are working on when they seem to be playing or busy.  They always amaze me with their answers.I couldn’t find anything in the 3rd grade school books that could have been more educational and meaningful than the research our daughter had been doing on her own. I just began to ask more often what she was working on and then I began doing everything I could to support those interests. She is the one who recently gave me the ideas for the 10- and 12-Subject Portfolios! I think it is funny that my unschooled child would be the one to want to design such a structured subject-by-subject learning plan for herself!

She has learned so much about so many subjects over the years and now she wants to put all her knowledge together in a Portfolio that is well organized. 

All of my children need differing amounts of structure, motivation, instruction, teaching, guidance, assignments, evaluation, and follow-up with their learning.  They are all unique.  My dyslexics need a lot of my help and investment when it comes to learning to read, write, and spell.  Dyslexia Games makes it easy, now that it exists. (continue reading by clicking Page 2 below)